Monthly Archives: March 2006

Thinking about thinking.

I often times find myself blankly thinking about nothing in particular.

Thinking about thinking.

I am thinking, I guess, but I don’t know that thinking about thinking actually constitutes thinking. Its like painting a painting. Is that art or just reproduction? I lean to reproduction.

When I take note of what it is that I am thinking about when I find myself unproductively sitting motionless often times I find myself in internal dialog with myself, debating the nature of my thoughts. What the hell is that and why can I not stop it? Why can I not be Einstein and actually think about something worthwhile like relativity or pondering facilitating some unknown need of the masses? Instead I find my self innately thinking about….. thinking.

I have concluded this to be an (mostly) unproductive and fruitless mindset, a mindset so deeply ingrained within my inner being that I cannot manage to weed the lil fucker out. I have however been attempting to (very unsuccessfully). I feel that this time in my grey matter could more efficiently applied to solving world impacting problems or wrapping my mind around the inherency of derived classes and data structures but still… I find myself thinking…. about thinking.

Am I alone in this? Trapped in my own internal devices and left solely at their mercy…helpless. Do not let me leave you with the impression that this internal place is a dark or horrible one, actually it closely resembles ‘lala land’ which is usually a relatively pleasant place for most, just entirely unproductive. My place , where I go when I am thinking about thinking, is equally unproductive but without the euphoria of the land of lala.

I dunno.. maybe I am crazy or just a self-centered underachiever (that underachiever part is an absolute known, not maybe). You, the 1-2 ppl who actually read this, am I alone in this or do you often times too find your self thinking about nothing in particular outside of pondering what exactly it is that you are thinking or am i fucking crazy for having to think about what it is that I am thinking? Never-the-less, I know I am crazy (something I take comfort and pride in actually – who the fuck wants to be normal?) I just wondered if this was one more prime example of my ever expanding lunacy or just some inherent, innate part of all human cognition….

Well, now, I am done… time to think some more… about…. thinking about thinking.

Google Pages is here.

The long awaited “google pages” service is finally rolled out it would seem..  The service is available on a limited basis but should be rolled out soon.  The WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get) editor has all the basic tools needed to create simple, streamlined pages and publish them via google’s service.

I look forward to see what will be created using the service.  I will have a more indepth review after work today…until then check out the page I created in 5 minutes this morning before going in.

http://ezell.matt.googlepages.com/home 

Summertime

summer showersMan ‘o’ man. Its coming. Summer is just around the bend and I am getting sorrier by the moment. Something about the summer makes me want to grab a 12pack and a canoe and head for a river.

To me a perfect work schedule would be working indoors during the winter and not working (period) during the summer. I am really looking foward to working hard this summer (hard at doing nothing even remotely productive).

I figure the summer will be deticated to the “arts”… yea… the arts. Pictures… thinking deeply about the metaphores that apply to the breeze (trying unsuccesfully not to sweat)…

Already we have gotten a taste of the spring showers. Warm afternoons kicking around the humidity.. I love it… nothing more refreshing than the flash thunderstorms and gully washers on a hot summer day. Its like a ‘reset’ button for the day….. all the smells and enviromental build up of the day washed away, hours before the normal time of hours after sunset.

Of course I am not stupid or forgetful (ok, well yes I am; just not here) I do remember the horribly smothering humid days where each breath requires the concentrated strength of 4 breaths… but… well…. I will worry about that later…. soon I will be canoeing and it will not matter…